Buffy + Edward = O-Mazing.

Swoon.

My second boyfriend takes the American Idol title.

When this season of American Idol kicked off, I took a brief break from the imaginary relationships I conduct in my head with my beloved second boyfriends John Krasinski and Rob Pattinson, and decided to make room in my heart for the stinkin' cuteness of Kris Allen. Before I get this blog going and join the masses of internet bloggers who will throw their literary two cents into the supposed "Idol finale upset," I need to take a moment to pay homage to the fashion train wreck that was Queen Latifah's black body suit.




I hope I'm not that only one who thinks that Adam Lambert could have rocked that outfit with a fierceness that rivals any female I know. My vote for the luckiest person in the room during that performance? Scott MacIntyre.

Aside from the Queen Latifah/Lil Round's duet and Rod Stewart's awkward trip over the microphone cord (when I say "trip over the microphone cord," I also mean Rod Stewart's entire performance), the show itself was incredibly entertaining. Even for Glenn who willingly offered to withstand the countless busy signals and cast his vote for Kris Allen the night before. (That's love right there.) The Black Eyed Peas actually got me to like their "Boom Boom Pow" song which I had earlier detested due to many Saturdays at Self Essentials spent listening to that song in heavy rotation on 92 pro FM. The dancers adorned in black and white body suits really added to the performance. I'm a sucker for the extra visuals.



I also enjoyed Adam's duet with Kiss. Glenn and I were a bit perplexed at first by Adam's unique choice of shoulder pads. Then we realized it was the glitterized Adam Lambert version of a Kiss costume (also adorned by Lady Gaga days earlier, at least according to Perez Hilton).



The Queen performance was equally as epic and it only led me to think that American Idol is the only place where Queen, Kiss, Rod Stewart, Cindi Lauper, Keith Urban and Steve Martin can share the same stage and it all just works. I realize that many people are quick to criticize American Idol, assuming the show promotes a certain narrow minded music mentality. However, I firmly believe American Idol exposes all generations (young and old) to different types of music. If anything, American Idol delivers musical diversity to a crowd of viewers who may not have ventured away from their musical comfort zones. Sure, you'll never see an indie rock band or underground hip hop group on the Idol stage but as "pop oriented" as Idol is, I think the show does an excellent job in it's attempts to give every music genre its own chance to grab new fans.

The climatic moment of the night led to what is now being referred to by every media outlet as the giant "Idol Upset," where poor Adam Lambert was "robbed" of the Idol throne. This is the problem I have with the media coverage of Kris Allen's win. How can it be called an Idol upset if Kris was rightfully voted into this title by the American public? America wanted Kris Allen to win; otherwise we would have seen a very different result. I do realize that most of Danny Gokey's fans gravitated towards Kris's music stylings over Adam's but how does that make Kris's win any less genuine or any less deserved? Kris Allen is an extremely talented performer, as is Adam but they represent two very different genres of music. In my opinion, Kris Allen is a far better well-rounded artist. He may not be as amazing to watch during his live performances but I'll tell you right now whose CD I'd rather listen to. I love Adam but I do not want his high pitch squeals flooding through my car radio. However, I am more excited to see Adam in concert than I am Kris. My opinion on this? These two performers are just far too different to compare against each other. I wish the media would stop portraying Kris's win as an "upset" and start recognizing him for what got him the title, his musical talent.

I am super excited to see the Idols on tour! Yay for early birthday presents from Glenn. :) I am always sad to see the show end every year but I'm excited for September where I get to see all of them live. I'm sure I'll have a very interesting blog with many glamorous photos to detail my experience. So I have 3 more months before I can see my second boyfriend in person. ;) And the countdown begins....

Cinco De Chihuahua.

Happy Cinco De Mayo! I am a proud Chihuahua Mama and I feel the need to acknowledge this holiday for Halpert's heritage sake. Truthfully, I had no idea what this holiday commemorated aside from giving the world populous an excuse to drink copious amounts of alcohol on a weekday. (I've come to realize that most of my friends do this anyway, holiday or not.)

According to Wikipedia, the go-to source for all those who seek knowledge, Cinco De Mayo commemorates the Mexican army's victory over French forces at the Battle of Puebla on May 5, 1862. 147 years later, that translates to "free margarita & tequila shots day" for Americans everywhere. It kind of reminds me of how Easter is celebrated. I'm not sure Jesus wanted everyone to celebrate his resurrection by hiding eggs, worshipping a giant furry bunny, and eating tons of marshmallow peeps. And just as kids lose the religious meaning of Easter in their hunt for a sugar rush, I'm sure millions of Americans are hammering back beers right now without even acknowledging the men that died in a Battle I didn't even know happened until I googled it.

I'll be spending this year's Cinco De Mayo at home watching American Idol with Glenn and Halpert. Maybe I'll make him wear a little sombrero to be festive, I'm sure they make Chihuahua sized Mexican attire.

I would like a nice glass of swine. Oink. Oink.

I feel compelled to write a blog in case I am stricken with Swine Flu and find myself bed ridden and without the brain power to write. According to the news I will get Swine Flue and I will die. OK. Not really. I just need to avoid any type of public place, stay inside my house in a Purell bath, sport a gas mask, and run screaming away from any one with a cough. My morning dose of Matt Lauer is leaving me with the same shakey uncertainty I feel during a trailer for a horror movie. However, listening to Arnold Schwarzenegger talk about the Swine Flu like it's a murderous villain he must crush with his bare hands is pretty much the most unintentionally hilarious clip I've seen on the news in a while.

I am officially not laid off at Brown. Wa-hoo? I can't even feign enthusiasm in grammatical form. Let me explain...As much as I am thankful and overwhelmingly blessed to have this steady, well paying and dependable job, I can't help but wonder what else is out there for me. At such a young age, I have found a place where I have my own beautiful office, an amazing boss, freedom to manage myself, and amazing co-works. In my performance review the other day, my boss commented that one day I will have to "leave the nest." She's right. I do. This job is wonderful but it's about as challenging as an I-Can-Read book. I know I'm capable of more but why would I risk the comforts of this seemingly perfect job? On my commute home the other day, I began to wish that I found this job when I was older and reaching retirement age. This would be a perfect job to have after slaving for years in corporate America, making a name for yourself and earning lots of money. I'm not sure it's such a great start for a 24 year old who should be pushing herself to achieve greater things. This job makes it a little too easy to rest on your laurels. Sometimes I wonder if being laid off would be the only way I'd leave this job to find the greater opportunities out there for me.

I guess I've been contemplating much about the future. Where I want to go in my career, do I even want to have a huge career or do I want to focus on being a mom one day? I have guilt for leaving my Chihuahua for 8 hours a day. How will I feel dropping my kids off to daycare or leaving them with my parents for 40 hours a week? Maybe Brown is the place to stay. Maybe having a leisure, flexible job is more important than having a lucrative, successful career and a fat bank account. I've been trying to debate what will be more important to me in four years, a career or my potential family? I guess only time will tell. With my 25th birthday looming around the corner, I can't help but wonder how much my life will change in the next 4years. 20 to 24 really only brought with it graduation and job changes. 25-29 may bring with it marriage, children, house buying and priority changes. It's a daunting age to hit because your future is looming ahead of you into paths I couldn't even begin to know how to navigate. Scary stuff. (Way scarier than swine.)

Not to mention, my youth is starting to deteriorate, literally. I woke up about a week and a half ago feeling like my neck was in a vice. Ever since then, I've been going to physical therapy trying to work the kinks out of what seems to be a herniated disk. This morning my doctor tells me I have early stage arthritis from years of running. Who gets arthritis at 24? I am now going to be just like the substitute teacher I had in high school, Miss Hensler. She was 3 feet tall with a hunch back the side of my head. Glenn said he'd still love me, hunch back and all. Maybe by that time, a hunch back will be the new boob job. :)

I think that pretty much sums up my thoughts for the week! Write soon.

<3

Observations, Obstacles and Overtures for the month of April.

Years after high school ends, and the memories of social ostracizing, and internal awkwardness fade, it only takes one person to bring all those feelings back. Eight years post high school and I can still become the insecure, self doubting, quiet blonde girl cornered by the heat of someone's judgmental gaze.

My time spent single in no way prepared me to fall in love again. Because the things you say you'll never do again, you find you have to in order to make the clock tick and the wheels turn and the emotions you swear you shut yourself off from, inevitably creep back in, all but leaving you with that empty sick feeling in your stomach at the thought of losing it all again. Break up survivor or not, love is absolutely terrifying.

Insecurities die hard. Or maybe they never go away. Maybe they lay in wait, coming to the surface only to remind us that whatever or whoever we're insecure over is just that important to us.

The world could be combusting from the inside out but karma will still continue its relentless battle to tip the scale for the good guys.

Halpert is still the absolute steadfast love of my life.

I seem to be struggling with the obstacles of my past that prevent me from healing and moving on. I've mastered the healing that allows you to go as far as to paint your face to smile. That part is cheating, faking, a fraud. I struggle with the rest. I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to show my skin without the recollection of how bad it hurt before.

If only love were as easy as obsessing over fictional characters. Jim Halpert and Edward Cullen would never break my heart.

I miss my friends. The transition from single girl to Glenn's dutiful girlfriend hasn't been easy. I love them all for sticking by me and reminding me of my perpetual lameness.

I'll eventually achieve a balance. Between friends and lovers. Between insecurity and confidence. Between nervous and calm. Between fearful and content. Between resilience and giving up. And between love and fear. Until then my friends....I'll be here. Writing until I figure it out. :)

My advice to my former self...

I found this writing prompt on a blog called "Twenty Something Writers" and it intrigued me. So here goes:

If you were able to communicate with your younger self, what would you say? Would you warn yourself of the things that are to come? Would you tell yourself to avoid certain people? Write a letter to yourself at a younger age. Feel free to tell yourself anything that you’d like to. Let us know what age of yourself you are writing to.

Dear eighteen year old Johnna,

Treasure the friendship you have with Robert. It will be the one thing that keeps you laughing, keeps you positive, and keeps you strong. And try not to introduce him to your friend Amanda. It doesn't end well.

Save every email and voicemail you shared with Andrew. You'll wish you saved all the silly conversations you had with him. Years from now, you'll be regretting the fact that you can't listen to his drunken voice say "see you in awhile lyle, lyle lovett."

Listen to your gut when it comes to your first impressions of a guy you're dating. It will save you from a six month relationship that will only make you look back, laugh and ask "what was I thinking?" It will also save you from a two year relationship that should have ended the day it got started. Please know that if a guy is a douchebag within the first month, that behavior will only worsen years down the line. And no, he won't ever change. You will though. A LOT.

Take a break from all the schoolwork. You will soon find that it doesn't matter if you graduate with a 4.0 or 3.0. The underachiever who drank his way through college and barely graduated with a business degree will still manage to make at least fifteen grand more than you and your sterling academic record and liberal arts degree.

Don't tattoo Bert McCracken's name on your back. It may seem like a good idea at the time but trust me, his music doesn't get any better.

Keep an eye out for a skinny, punk rock kid named Glenn. I'm sure he's around at some concert you're going to this week. I'm fairly certain that if you met him a lot sooner, you two would be celebrating your 6 year anniversary right now. But don't worry if you can't spot him, he comes along just when you need him.

Never park in the President's driveway next to Independence Hall on the URI campus. Yes, your car will be towed and no, it won't be funny.

Don't let the pressure to be perfect from your parents make you crack. You will soon learn that you will never please them. Not now or not ever. Focus on you and know that you end up moving out just when you said you would.

Give Mike McKenna a giant hug at his last Turning Blue show. It will be the last time you see him and you will always look back to that moment and regret not saying a meaningful goodbye.

Your friends Greg, Blake, Paul and JT are still around and probably always will be. Treasure them and try to hang out with them more. You'll have fun. Promise.

Yes, you do still kind of have a crush on Ryan Muir. I still don't quite get it either.

You are going to have a pretty amazing life after you graduate college so don't worry that you won't accomplish everything you want to. You do and then some. Relax. About everything. Your grades. Your parents. Your love life. Your friends. Everything. Just take a deep breath because you will soon find out that everything has its strange way of working itself out beautifully. You'll soon realize that all the worry, the stress, the belly aches will not (and won't ever) alter what you can't control. So enjoy the next six years of your life and take everything for what it's worth. I promise you make it out alive.

Confessions of a Shopaholic: Movie Review

I'm helping Feeney out with his movie review blog by reveiwing a movie he thought would somehow capsulate his manhood. So read, enjoy, buy a movie ticket. And while you're at it, buy a popcorn and soda...stimulate the economy and all that.

Confessions of a Shopaholic




A light hearted and relatable portrayal of a girl
who truly believes that an accessory can change her life.


Before I divulge into my take of the cinematic portrayal of Sophie Kinsella’s famous book series Confessions of a Shopaholic, I think I have a confession to make myself. My name is Johnna Moretti, and I am a shopaholic. That’s right; I am a sale hounding, shiny store window obsessed, full fledged shopaholic. Rebecca Bloomwood, meet your doppelganger, Johnna Moretti. So I joined the legions of women who fell in love with Miss Bloomwood’s shopping peril’s in the original book series, because I too saw a piece of myself in her hopeless love affair with retail. And I can say with the utmost confidence that director PJ Hogan and actress Isla Fisher, truly brought charm and relatability into this unsung heroine who completely understands the life changing power that comes with buying a new outfit.

When we first meet Rebecca Bloomwood, she is an unhappy journalist struggling to obtain her dream position as a writer for the high fashion magazine, Alette. Her shopping addiction is made evidently clear to the audience as we see her try to convince herself and friends that someone had stolen her Mastercard after realizing she had spent $900 dollars in one month. She frequently falls under the fashion thrall of talking store window mannequins and she almost buys 97 hotdogs just to get an extra twenty dollars in her pocket. After losing her job, Rebecca is unemployed and faced with over sixteen thousand dollars in debt.

Forced to take a job at a financial planning magazine, Rebecca makes a name for herself as “The Girl with the Green Scarf.” She uses her retail and fashion expertise by comparing complex financial planning terms to basic shopping principles. After all, what better way to explain cost and worth to a fashion hounding public than with a Gucci shoe analogy? Despite her career successes, she is still struggling with her credit card debt, including avoiding a particularly vicious debt collector, Derek Smeath. Broken legs, sick aunts, and a bought with malaria are only some of the excuses Rebecca and her friends give the relentless Smeath. He eventually finds Rebecca’s place of employment and in an attempt to hide her debt from her financially savvy co-workers, she claims Smeath is a psycho ex-boyfriend who is stalking her.

The lies surrounding Rebecca’s financial situation deepen as she develops feelings for her financially astute boss, Luke Brandon. Soon her shopping habits begin to threaten the inner workings of Rebecca’s love and social life as she is forced to make a choice between her addiction to shopping and her relationships with her friends and family. The audience is reminded of the eventual toll that shopping and extreme self indulgence can take. We begin to see Rebecca’s life turn around as she begins to resist the overwhelming need to shop.

Admittedly, the movie is far from Oscar winning. The plot is predictable and the jokes are slightly unoriginal. However, the light hearted take on a shopaholics eventual turnaround, is received as a welcome break from our own financial worries in a less than perfect economy. The audience is able to laugh at Rebecca’s struggles with her new mantra “Do I really need this?” because like much of the audience, I too have grappled with this very battle between want and need. Ultimately, the movie sends a sense of hope to its audience as Rebecca’s Dad reminds us all, ‘if the American economy can be billions in debt and still survive, so can you.”

And for all you men out there who blanch when their girlfriends/wives bring up the idea of watching this movie…never fear. Ed Helms, (aka Andy from The Office) and John Goodman bring enough comedic relief that stirred more than a few chuckles from my boyfriend. I highly recommend this movie to anyone who feels alone in their overwhelming financial worries. This movie is a light hearted, two hour escape from the constraints of our own wallet and for a confessed shopaholic like me; it reminded me that 9 out of 10 times, the best things in your life can’t be found in a store. 

Always be yourself....unless you suck: My ode to Joss Whedon and various other thoughts on Friday the 13th, 2009

My life has been so un-blog worthy lately. I can probably attribute this to the fact that I have been extremely happy for the past two months. I need to get over the writing block that cramps my brain when the endorphins flow and remind myself that blogging isn't only meant for inner turmoil and romantic angst.

I've been re-watching old episodes of Buffy and the Vampire Slayer lately. Everytime I watch, I am reminded of what an unsung genius Joss Whedon truly is. His character development and dialogue writing is absolutley amazing and his attention to detail and mastery of subtlety in his writing astounds me. If I become half the writer he is in my life time, I will consider myself an extremely accomplished woman. I highly recommend everyone taking the time to get into that series. It'll change your life. True story. (Sidenote: I also think Glenn is exactly like Xander on Buffy and I've always had a giant crush on Xander. Life imitating art I tell ya.)

I seriously think every spoof of Christian Bale's freak out is hilarious. Stephen Colbert & Steve Martin has been the funniest so far. I have to thank Christian Bale's ridiculous temper for many shakey laugh fits these past two weeks. Although Glenn & I's attempt at changing the face of "Rick Rolling" to "Christian Bale-ing" failed horribly. I shake my fist at the volume on power point! Or as my friend Christian Bale would say to Power Point, what the FUCK do you think you're doing?! Are you a FUCKING professional?!


I need to invest in making copies upon copies of every key I own. I learned yesterday that if you don't have spare keys, you're basically up shit creek without a paddle...or a key to your tobogan or whatever you float up shit creek in.


Apparently women in the 1950s did not have to eat or exhale. I got my dress today from Unique Vintage for Glenn and I's 50's inspired Valentine's Day Dinner and let me just say, this dress could make Michael Feeney look fat. I'd be fine as long as I was not expected to breathe or injest food or liquids at any point of the night. Since we're going to an Italian restaurant that night, I'm going to need the extra dress room for a little Italian food baby to emerge. Emergency dress shopping begins tonight at 6pm.

Wow...that's really all I can come up with! Unless you want me to gush about how wonderful Glenn is which I just refuse to do for fear that I've become one of "those girls." (Just for the record...he is pretty frickin wonderful.) I will be writing soon lovelies.

<3

25 things and then some...

To many people's chagrin, the "25 things about me" note has slowly been taking over, popping its cheery little head amongst news feeds all over the facebooking community. I personally love reading 25 random tidbits about my friends. No matter how much you think you know someone, they can still surprise you in something as silly as a facebook chain. Or in some cases, the people I didn't know so well have enlightened me with small things about themselves that I would have otherwise not known. So to all of you naysayers, I think you're just a little too chicken to take on the 25 things challenge. Oh that's right, I went there.

So after I finished my note, I realized I could probably write 25 more things but I wouldn't be that self indulgent on facebook. However, a blog is entirely self indulgent so why wouldn't I carry on here?

Without any further a due, here is my "25 things about me: part deux:"

26.) I have a seriously strange connection with a certain individual (let's call him Shmyan Shmuir) that I went to high school with. I can eerily predict when and where I will run into him. I've tried to use my psychic powers in other ways that would be far more beneficial to my life, but it only seems to work on him.

27.) When I get really nervous, I always carry Two in my purse.

28.) Because of this, Two always seems to smell like spearmint gum.

29.) I give Halpert pep talks before I leave the house in the morning. We go over what he'll do in my absence, including play with his toys, poop, and nap. Then I tell him all the fun we'll have when I get home. I feel as if he appreciates this time I take out of my morning even if sometimes it makes me late for work.

30.) I am extremely irritated by people who don't seem to have a dark side to them. We all are a little fucked up inside. Isn't that what makes us interesting?

31.) The only girl I have ever considered to be my best friend is Barb. She restored my faith in the female gender. Yet, her departure to California makes me question if I'm truly meant to have a best friend who is a girl.

32.) Even though I only see him every couple months, I know Greg Johnson will be in my life forever. Same goes for Robert and oddly enough; these are the only two people that I am 100% confident in the belief that I will know them for the rest of my life.

33.) I go through phases when I am an extreme home body, and a party girl. I never can quite master balancing the two.

34.) It's taken me almost 10 years to figure out, but I think I'm finally starting to see that it is possible for a guy to treat you exactly how you think you deserve to be treated.

35.) I still consider the time that Adam Lazzara from Taking Back Sunday said 'shit sweetheart, this songs about you' to be the sexiest moment of any concert I've ever been to. (Even though he didn't even say it to me).

Sidenote: This also tops seeing Britney Spears in her nude diamond body suit psuedo masturbating in a tub.

36.) I still laugh over the fact that I ever dated Shaun Hague.

37.) I can read a book in an entire sitting but I usually fall asleep midway through a two hour movie.

38.) I am an absolute lyrics junkie. I still feel as if there is a song out there that I have yet to discover that will explain my life perfectly.

39.) I feel as if I have three different families: My actual family, my co-workers at Brown and my co-workers at Self Essentials. The girls at both work places have helped me immensely over the years and I honestly don't know where I'd be without all of them.

40.) I sometimes want to up and leave and move to London. I feel as if I'm going to have a huge event in my life one day which will result in a drastic move. It also fits with my theory that I am destined to marry a British man.

41.) If above does not happen; I hope my husband takes me to London on our honeymoon.

42.) I really believe that I was a World War I nurse in a past life and I had a passionate affair with a soldier.

43.) I completely believe in ghosts but I never want to see one for fear that I will go insane as a result.

44.) I am still torn on the existence of God. My poppa's passing has convinced me that there is something else out there but I don't think I'll ever be ready to commit to a religion.

45.) I also think deeply and radically religious people are ignorant.

46.) That said, I have my talks with the big man (whoever he is) and he knows I'm trying every day to make him proud.

47.) My mom was supposed to be a nun. I'm glad she decided otherwise.

48.) My brother and sister used to say I was like the guy in Beetle juice who hangs from the ceiling and says 'feeling a little flat.' I've gained some weight since then. Maybe they'll lay off now.

49.) The only way I would eat when I was little was if my parents put on Cindi Lauper's "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" video on the T.V. Oddly enough, I am still happier when I eat while watching The Family Guy, Buffy or The Office. And I refuse to eat while watching anything new. I had odd eating habits from the womb.

50.) I used to think Slimmer from the Ghostbusters movie lived on my ceiling at night. Little did I know, it was just the little green spots you see from staring at the light for too long.

I think that's all for now. :)

(How's that for raw Feeney?)

Serendipity & Heath Ledger.

Yesterday was the one year anniversary of Heath Ledger's death. And this blog is not what you think...I'm not about to write a tribute to Heath Ledger (as much as I was, and still am, extremely saddened about his passing). The realization of this one year landmark made me think back to where I was at the exact moment that I was delivered the news of his death. It's strange how you keep memories in these tiny caverns within your brain. And they wait and rest until the moment they are called forward; their push into the forefront of your mind can seem quick, almost violent. For a moment, it's as if the rules of time and space don't really exist because transportation to another place, another time seems so effortless.

So I figured with these thoughts fresh in my head, why not use my blog to dust the cobwebs off of my past. Because after all, what is a blog's purpose if not a tool to reflect on the past?

I was still in the grieving aftermath of my break up with Dante and going through the same depressing motions that had become my nightly routine in the month or so after our split; get home from work, get into pajamas, snuggle with Halpert and crawl into bed. Rob called me on my cell phone shortly after to tell me about Heath's passing and I remember telling him that I'm sure that the radio station he had heard this on was wrong. I switched to E! News and in tiny writing on the bottom of the screen were the details of his passing. It was devastating to think of such a gifted, young and talented actor dying far before his time. News like that can certainly cast a hopeful light on what minutes earlier seemed to be the dark and depressing remnants of your once fulfilling life.

I quickly mass texted my friends, including Dante (our first post break up text communication). He didn't respond. I immediately felt shallow and selfish for feeling more sadness from Dante's failed acknowledgement of my text than of the ending of someone's life. In the end though, aren't we all ultimately selfish that way? Our own pain can feel so much greater than anyone elses.

Months later, the midnight showing of the Dark Knight marked another memory of a night equally as insignificant in action, but heavy with meaning. However, this is a memory that draws a smile because it was the first time I realized that not all things that end, have to end horribly. And now, one year later, the death of Heath Ledger marks yet another mundane but meaningful day in my life.

Serendipity in it's literal translation means to make a fortunate discovery by accident. Last night in a seemingly casual conversation, I was faced again with the threat of an end. A hypothetical end, an end that I could make a reality, or an end that doesn't have to be an end. Whatever way this perpetual end chooses to shake itself out, I couldn't help but think how this anniversary brought me back full circle.

I am certainly not implying that Heath Ledger has some sort of mythical or mystical impact on my life but I do believe it's strange that in a year, no matter how many leaps and bounds you may take as a person, life will inevitably present you with the same challenges. Maybe I am always meant to experience an end. Maybe this is my way to prove to myself that I am strong. Maybe this is just another lily pad I'm perching on in my journey to the other side of the pond. Maybe this one will prove my past wrong. I can't be certain right now of what this serendipitous occasion of Heath Ledger's death means in the great scheme of my life. But whoever is keeping an eye out for me in this lifetime, your irony is not lost on me.

So I'll keep on trucking along because if anything, this one year landmark between January 22nd, 2008 and January 22nd, 2009, has shown me my own changes in the truest form. It's incredible how one year can make such a big difference....

Till next time folks. :)

How could you be so heartless?

*In the night, I hear them talk the coldest story ever told. Somewhere far along this road, he lost his soul to a woman so heartless.*

It's been a little chilly lately due in much part to the biting cold temperatures of January. My toes have since recovered from a particularly brutal snow storm on New Year's Eve. Katelyn and I risked possible frost bite and hypothermia in an effort to look cute in our New Year's dresses and I'd say the results of our efforts were definitely worth it. Despite the obvious winter winds, I've been feeling a bit more of the "metaphorical" chill and some of the ones I hold near and dear are responsible for my inner chill to the bone.

Glenn and I are now a couple. Yay! :) It's the official blog announcement. Some people are surprised, some saw it coming from a mile away, some are just plain old happy that I found myself a really great guy and some are downright upset about it. And me? Little old me? (How nice of you to ask how I'm feeling about this.) I'm just really happy and content! I have a best friend and a boyfriend all wrapped up in one. I don't think a girl could get any luckier.

Now here's my piece (my scarf and hat if you will) to defend against some bitter and chilly reactions I've received to this news. Glenn and I have been friends from the minute I met him way back in July during the Neil Hamburger show at The Living Room. We were just friends and as much as it was glaringly obvious to everyone else, I truly just saw him as that; a friend. As for the start of our romantic relationship? All I can say is it all kind of ...happened, as those things often do. Blame it on Holiday magic? Who knows? All I know is he stuck by me unflailingly through so much and it just dawned on me that I had a wonderful guy right in front of me who would do anything to be with me; a quality that has been severely lacking in my boyfriends of the past. I deserve someone like him and I'm so happy that I finally put my past behind me and opened myself up to something really wonderful.

I'm sorry if my decision to settle down with this amazing person has upset any of my beloved friends but hear me out.... if I mean to you, what you mean to me, you'd find a way to understand that this is the best thing for me. I hate to lose friends, especially the important ones, but if that's what has to happen; I'll sacrifice. Because honestly, if a friendship could end over the start of something else, it was never much of a friendship to begin with, now was it?

I feel at peace with where I am right now. I have put my inner relationship demons to rest for now. I feel safe as houses with Glenn and it's nice to finally let myself have that with someone again. I guess you could say his unwavering faith in me led to all of this. Through everything I went through in the past few months, that boy never gave up on me I guess it just goes to show you that nice guys don't always finish last.

That's it for now folks! I hope my blog will still be interesting without all my inner romantic turmoil. :)